楼主: 口心雨
|
古典诗十四期第十四讲晴组作业贴: |
| ||
| ||
| ||
点评
诗作前两句不错,履指鞋或脚步,用于此处不妥,何不用路之类的。尾句意思不明朗,与三句也不搭。
| ||
| ||
|Archiver|手机版|小黑屋|古典听风书院 ( 蜀ICP备15023305号-1 )
GMT+8, 2025-1-3 07:00 , Processed in 0.124676 second(s), 19 queries .
Powered by Discuz! X3.2 Licensed
© 2001-2013 Comsenz Inc.