楼主: 桂苑11-大陈
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古典诗十四期基础第十二讲冬组作业贴: |
点评
问好同学,整首诗洋溢着一股分手的喜悦,总的来说语句还算通顺,略显直白,瑟瑟词意偏冷,和整首诗的情感基调不和谐,承句略显笼统,可以做具体细节描写,比如忙的具体场面,能做到点面结合,才能让诗显得更饱满
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