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古典诗十一基础第十二讲春组作业贴: |
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点评
问好琳达同学!本讲作业由舟来为你点评,水平所限,有谬评之处请谅解。起句的滟娆素雅并用有相克之嫌。承句可谓清新秀丽之句。转合有点跑题,尤其合句必须回扣起承。要恰题。纯属个见。加油!
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点评
问好老漫,这首诗格律正确,承句直白,转句突兀,多情在前面没有合理铺垫,结句,凑了,荷花的特点是高洁,静美,不是以香见长的花。说贪恋荷香,略感不妥,说的只是个人看法,仅供参考
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