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古典词十九初级班折桂组第十讲作业 |
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点评
寒月公子:你好。感情顺畅流来如水。(孤馆,好久没见有人用此二字,可搜戚氏“孤馆度日如年”)人如落叶羁绊他乡而无奈。过片起两句,字词需炼。结很好,留有余韵。注意领字
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点评
问好雨笛!上阙不错!
下阙悬壶济世来得比较突兀,上阙铺垫不足。
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