5200| 55
|
词十四基础班第四讲画楼组作业贴;评阅老师:单层《润龙》,双层《梅下吹笛》 |
| ||
| ||
| ||
| ||
| ||
| ||
点评
你好,寒冬腊月可以换个词。太熟悉。下片前两句都写水,重复了。
| ||
点评
你好,上片好于下片,下片议论过多。
| ||
|Archiver|手机版|小黑屋|古典听风书院
( 蜀ICP备15023305号-1 )
GMT+8, 2025-4-10 04:07 , Processed in 0.129834 second(s), 29 queries .
Powered by Discuz! X3.2 Licensed
© 2001-2013 Comsenz Inc.