楼主: 桂苑11-大陈
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古典诗十一期七绝第十四讲夏组作业贴: |
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问好冷月!整首流畅,叙事造景言情互为交融,文辞复有可品读处,见得诗意!个别用字:“闻”处未如用“看”自然,此处仅能以通感视之;“过”换“去"呢?起后面之“天涯”应会更紧密,个见仅供参考!
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